To Hyphenate or Not?

A few weeks ago I gave Paul a small (and free!) Valentine's day surprise. I arranged tickets to see Anderson Cooper's fairly new talk show. The taping was scheduled for this morning.

Paul has an ongoing celebrity crush on him. He admits it freely. Maybe it is his major street cred for being a world class journalist with an incredible resume and ethic.  Or, maybe it is his silver fox hair, burning blue eyes, and slight frame. Or, maybe it's that he is a Vanderbilt for goodness sake! Who knows?!

Some people might get jealous but, my view is frankly, if Anderson would take him...Godspeed! I hope he's into a house full of chotchkies.

Paul once passed him on the street in Manhattan - and reverently remembers his almost-encounter. So, I naturally encouraged him that today he should seize his chance - - - '...corner him and ask if he remembers passing your longing stare.' 

He's a bit too fussy for my taste but who am I to get in the way of making Paul's heart go pitter patter? ...especially since it was a Valentine's gift.

Anyway, the show tapes in the Time Warner building at Columbus Circle so we made our way into NYC early this morning. The tickets said we should arrive no later than 9AM. Despite horrendous morning traffic and drizzle, we played morning hooky from our jobs and made it just as the clock hit 9. We were shuffled on to an elevator to the 6th floor studio that had a grand view overlooking Central Park.

Before you are allowed into the studio, the audience wranglers give each person a 2-page single spaced release form that must be signed and dated.

Paul went to use the restroom and I perused the release, reading the first sentence or two of each paragraph and gave it no more mind. It was the standard fare notice that we shouldn't discuss the topic of the show before it airs and we are signing our image rights away, yada yada yada.

Someone came over to me and asked if I were lost since I was standing in the middle of the hall. 'No, just waiting for my partner, I said.'  She reminds me that when he returns, we should go over to the tables in the distance and sign the forms.

As we approached a table, Paul flipped right to the signature page and a member of Anderson's staff approached us and asked if we had carefully read the entire form.

'Of course.' I proclaimed and jokingly added, 'But who do I talk to if I want to negotiate a few terms?'

I laughed and we went to the end of the very long line that led to the studio and waited.

A few minutes later, one of the producers walked over to us and asked us to come with her. As we were walking, she asks what questions we had about the release. I'm thinking to myself, 'Oh crap. I really don't have any REAL questions...it was a joke. I don't want to be pushed to the back of the line again.'

She assures us, '....it's fine if you have any questions....I just want to make sure you understand what you are being asked to sign.'

I think that her response is a whole lot of much to do about nothing. I assuage her by telling her I was just kidding and she proceeds to put us in a 'special line.' She says she wants to make sure we get good seats since she pulled us out of line. Okay with me. Not sure why but fine with me.

Fast forward and we are seated in the FRONT ROW, SMACK IN THE CENTER!  Literally, we could extend our hands and if Anderson were kind enough to do the same, than he and Paul could have skipped into the sunset with their pet unicorn, talking about braiding hair.

We are laughing at our fortune as we get settled and Paul tells me all about his plans for he and Anderson to raise our girls together.

What's that Daddy-o? Okay...just to be clear, Ms. Thang can have Paul...but NOT my children!

Anyway, the show was your typical day time talk show fare - which pursuant to the release we had to sign, made us promise not to discuss it.

But just between us on this blog, it was a show about life changing scams. Don't tell anyone, okay? I don't want to get in any trouble. :-)

At the end of the show - after some truly horrific stories of people being misled and/or scammed with their lives remaining in turmoil - they did a 180 turn with a light-hearted bit about the release forms we signed.

Apparently, the fine print had a a few crazy clauses buried within the legal jumble.

Among them, all audience members agreed to name their first child Anderson, regardless of being a boy or girl, and that we should all be available to become ambassadors of his show in China at their demand.

The intention was to show that it's never a good idea to blindly sign or agree to something, no matter the source. This is a good lesson that I'll surely think about again. There was only 1 member in the audience of 300 or so that caught this shenanigan.

I did read the release forms but only peripherally. Clearly, I missed the part of about our first born.

Paul, on the other hand, well...I actually suspect that he did read it and had already started to quietly decorate the nursery for little baby Andy (or Andi)!

You'll be able to see it in the next week or so. Be sure to look for my giant head....right next to Paul swooning!